Friday, April 1, 2011

April ->>>August and After

Hey, Y'all,
Well, I guess this is going to be somewhat of a saga, goes. This is kind of my last year in recap, but kind of all at one time instead of in bits and pieces. This story is not told to gain your sympathy, but to relate how very gracious our God is in supplying our needs as we have them. 

 Last year at the end of April, I was planning to attend our grandson's wedding here in Texas. Matthew and his dear Amy were getting married on the first weekend in May. I couldn't leave my husband, W.B. (Dubby) by himself because he had dementia, and was not able to care for himself, and so I left him in the care of an assisted living facility that he and I had both been in for a month the year before when I was recovering from surgery. We lived in East Tennessee at the time. So, on the first of May, I flew to Texas and left Dubby in the facility. While I was here in Texas, he fell and broke a hip the day before the wedding, which he then had surgery to repair, and I headed back home the day following the wedding. His nieces and our good friend (and surrogate daughter, Allie), looked after him in the hospital until I could get back home. God supplied that need as it came.

From the hospital then, it was into the nursing home for him (and me, kind of, because when a family member is in the nursing home the rest of the family is there, too, many hours of the day). All through the month of May and June, there were many things to be done, and I had the support of so many people - friends, family, and some that were strangers but soon became friends. I also had the grace of God to bear me up. During that time, there were many decisions to be made...what to do if Dubby didn't make it home but had to remain in the nursing home indefinitely (till death) and how could we afford it? The truth is, we could not have. God supplied the ways for us to go.

I decided to go ahead and apply for Medicaid, because we have never been what could be considered wealthy by the world's standards. After talking it over with Carol, we decided the best thing I could do was to buy a house out here in Texas. While I was rushing around, getting documents, and caring for Dubby every day at the nursing home, our daughter, Teresa, who lives in Alabama, and I, searched for the right house online while our daughter, Carol, and her husband, Daryl, out here in Texas searched in person, actually seeing the houses. They found one that we had liked the looks of to be quite suitable, in a good neighborhood and wheelchair accessible in case Dubby got to leave the nursing home. God supplied that need.

In the meantime, my Dubby was not getting any stronger, but weaker, and among other problems, had to be permanently catheterized because of kidney failure from his diabetes. Carol and Daryl arranged for him to be accepted at a local nursing home here in Texas, and our niece, Donna, who lives in East Tennessee, came and took us from the nursing home in TN to the airport in Knoxville, and saw us off on our way to Texas. We arrived here and Carol picked us up at the airport and took us the a wonderful nursing home here in Texas that was only about five minutes from the house I bought here with Carol's help. This was on July 7th, and twenty days later, he was gone to be with our Lord. I had just been home to Tennessee to pack up the house and my neighbors, the Benjamins, literally packed it up for me with my directions.  I had driven back with my good friend, Ina, and God supplied that need so that I would not have to return to Texas driving by myself. My Dubby had told the nurse that night that he was going home and he went to be with our God the very next morning.

The whole family here, and our grandson in Illinois with his family, came back to Tennessee to honor him and see him laid to rest. When I say the whole family here and in Illinois, I mean sixteen people plus me. He would have been so pleased. The funeral services were beautiful and I had the support and love of so many friends there that we had known in our lifetime there. God was right there with us.

While we were in Tennessee, I discovered that our daughter, Teresa, had breast cancer and would soon begin treatment for that. God has been so good to us in the past few months, bringing her and her husband, Tom, through the time of recovery in her illness. (God is good all the time) 

The months since Dubby's passing have been a time of mourning for me, and still, quite often, I feel the sadness creep over me, but I know that Dubby is in God's hands. I have found so many new friends here, it is wonderful. The people at Carol and Daryl's church just opened their arms to me and took me in and comforted me in my time of sorrow. I have been attending a Bible study in James and realizing anew how very much God is there for all Christians who have trials and sorrows. It has been a very fulfilling study for us. 

I have been able to slowly adjust to being alone, and my family here has been wonderful. Teresa is recovering and has been able to keep working from home...God is good all the time...and I know their faith has been strengthened by the trials they have been through. She is almost finished with her radiation treatments. We get to see each other on Skype and talk almost every day.

Well, that is a good portion of my story. I get to see our grandchildren often because most of them live here in the area, and it is wonderful. I  keep in touch with family back in Tennessee and am planning to visit for a week in May. I keep busy here, and have become a Farmville player, and have met a lot of wonderful people that way. I feel like I know them personally. I am a "people person". I look forward to getting to know many of you, my blogging friends. 

This is Blabbin' Grammy signing off for now. Much love to each of you, my friends and family. Bye for now. More later.


Ocean Girl said...

Dear Grammy, I was right there with you as I just got to know you around the wedding time, all the way to Texas, but on 18 July I stopped blogging. I had to stop and break away from thinking about my husband who passed away about 3 years ago. I am a widow too Grammy.

I didn't know about the passing of your husband till I resumed my blogging four months later. God is Most Gracious and He dispenses His Grace. All praise is due to Him and Him only.

I am doing the A-Z challenge too;) And Farmville is really great, to be able to chat with friends as we work the farm. What could be more fun;)

welcome to my world of poetry said...

Ruby I have been with you quite along time and through all your trials and tribulations. I admire you, you have been through so much yet you have carried on, loving the family, caring for Teresa who is always in my prayers. you are a wonderful lady,
Good Luck with the challenge,

Grammy said...

Hi, Ocean Girl and Yvonne,
Thank you so much for your comments, and support. Looking forward to reading lots of posts.
Love you both. Ruby

Nf1andprek-whisper said...

glad to see you again.. from last year..and sorry to read and remember again.. your pain.. and worry... I am glad you are feeling good..

Karen Walker said...

Dear Ruby,
I am so very sorry for your loss. You sound like such a strong person and I know that even though it is hard, you will be okay.

Sylvia Ney said...

My goodness. I'm sorry for your loss. I look forward to reading more about your strength and life journey.

Alex J. Cavanaugh said...

God had a purpose and reason for getting you to Tennessee. Glad you're doing the Challenge, Ruby. That's how we met last year!

Anonymous said...

Amen that god is supplying all your needs! He's supplying ours too. He is good to us and we just have to trust him through the good times and the not so good times.

Marjorie said...

Ruby, I haven't visited you for a little while. I did know about Dub's passing and offer my condolences, because I'm not sure I ever got the chance.

Grammy said...

Thank you all so very much and thanks for visiting me. It is good to be here in Texas with family now that Dubby is gone. I surely do miss him, and one day my remains will lie beside his back in Tennessee where we spent most of our lives.

Arlee Bird said...

This has been a year of major changes for you for sure. But you've got a lot ahead of you yet as you embark on each new adventure. You truly amaze me and I admire your resilience.


KarenG said...

And to think I used to believe getting older meant life would settle down. I guess change is just a big part of it. Sorry for your loss and troubles of the year. It sounds like you have a wonderfully supportive family. I'm amazed that you are participating in the challenge this year. I look forward to your posts!


Grammy said...

Arlee and Karen,
Thank you for the visit and well wishes! I had a very strong mother and Dad, and learned determination from the best. :)

baygirl32 said...

So sorry for your loss. You sound like a very strong person.

Hope you enjoy the A to Z challenge

Gregg said...

God's grace is a marvelous and wonderful thing. It is comforting and encouraging to know He supplied your need when you needed it and will do so in the future. I, too, am sorry for your lost - but absent from the body is to be present with our Lord!

Better is Possible said...

I can tell you're a people person...and a very likable people person. Thanks for sharing some of your story. Yes God is Good...and all the time.
I look forward to visiting you again.

Gail M Baugniet said...

I'm sorry for your loss and happy for your strength.

kathy stemke said...

I love your picture with Gramps. God bless.

Elaine in Florida said...

Ruby..I started following your blog around the time your Dubby went into the nursing facility. I am so amazed at your determination to live life to the fullest and sharing your adventures with us.. ALWAYS with a happy smile!!! I hope that one day I will get to meet you.

Grammy said...

Thanks, all of you who commented! I would love to meet all of you in person, too. :)

TnBassPkr said...

Hello Ruby,,just wanted to drop you a line to send you love from our house to yours. We hope you are doing well,we miss you and hope to see you soon. Love,,Mike, Tina and Josh

Anonymous said...

What year it has been. And I first met you this time last year :o)

Penned Pebbles said...

Nice to meet you! So sorry for your loss but glad that your strength is in the Lord! We used to live in Sevierville in the Cosby area. Wishing you a blessed weekend and happy A2Zing!

Penned Pebbles

Margaret Hall said...

Dear Grammy...It had been AGES since I had heard from you and now I see why...I have missed your blog and from now on, I don't want to miss a "letter'~!! You are an AMAZING Soul, and your strength has been your life...Love that we contacted one another again~!!
Glad you are on the Challenge!

Tori Cooper said...

Hi Grammy Ruby, I love how you constantly brought everything back to God and His goodness, he has taken good care of you! Grieving is not an easy process but a healthy one... I'm so glad to hear that you have an incredible support system! Glad your doing the challenge again this year... will keep in touch! Love Victoria