Twenty-Five Reasons

Hey, Y'all,
One of my nieces sent this to me the other day, via e-mail, and of course, it is one of those circulated items that everyone gets at one time or another. If you have already read it, just please excuse my repeating it. Thanks.

25 Reasons I Owe My Mother (some of these I really heard from my mom, and some I didn't).
1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE.
'If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning.'
2. My mother taught me RELIGION.
'You better pray that will come out of the carpet.'
3. My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL.
'If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week.'
4. My mother taught me LOGIC.
'Because I said so, that's why.'
5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC.
'If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the store with me."
6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT.
'Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you are in an accident.'
7. My mother taught me IRONY.
'Keep crying and I'll really give you something to cry about.'
8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS.
'Shut your mouth and eat your supper.'
9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM.
'Would you look at that dirt on the back of your neck!'
10. My mother taught me about STAMINA.
'You'll sit there till all that spinach is gone.'
11. My mother taught me about WEATHER.
'That room of yours looks like a tornado went through it.'
12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY.
'If I told you once, I've told you a hundred times; don't exaggerate!'
13. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE.
'I brought you into this world; I can take you out!'
14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION.
'Stop acting like your father!'
15. My mother taught me about ENVY.
'There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do.'
16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION.
'Just wait till we get home.'
17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING.
'You are going to get it when we get home.'
18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE.
'If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to freeze that way.'
19. My mother taught me ESP.
'Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you are cold?'
20. My mother taught me humor.
'When that lawn mower cuts off your foot, don't come running to me.'
21. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT.
'If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up.'
22. My mother taught me GENETICS.
'You're just like your father.'
23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS.
'Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?'
24. My mother taught me WISDOM.
'When you get to be my age, you'll understand.'
25. My mother taught me about JUSTICE.
'One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you.'

I'd like to add one of my own that my mom used to say when we were dangerously close to getting a whipping, but she considered the threat a warning. (Taught us about the HEREAFTER). 'You're flirting with the undertaker.' (If you don't know what that means, ask an older adult who has heard it.)

Well, that is it for today. Just a bit of fluff to fill the space and bring some humor. This is Blabbin' Grammy signing off for today. May God's love and peace fill your heart and those empty spaces that need filling. Bye for now.